The Fifth Commandment
Call to worship:
Pastor bobby owens
Mark 7.8-13
song:
Come praise & glorify
Historical reading:
pastor zachary mcguire
Westminter Shorter Catechism Q&A 64-66
song:
It is well
Confession & Pardon (w/ 10 commandments):
pastor brett eckel
song:
Doxology
song:
See the destined day arise
Sermon:
dr. alex logionw
“The 5th Commandment”
Exodus 20.12
Introduction
When I was growing up I was a big Michael J. Fox fan. Obviously I loved Back to the Future (still do) but there was a period of time when I was super into Family Ties. Who remembers Family Ties? Family Ties was a sitcom that ran from 1982-1989 so I didn’t watch it live but when I was a little older the reruns were syndicated at like 6a so I would ask my dad to wake me up early before he went to work so that I could watch Family Ties.
Michael J. Fox played Alex P. Keaton on Family Ties. Alex P. Keaton was a young Republican who relentlessly pursued “get rich quick” schemes. This made for some situational comedy because his parents were liberal former hippies. What makes Family Ties unique is the atypical juxtaposition of liberal parents with a child who rebels by embracing conservative politics. The stereotypical scenario is a child rebelling against conservative parents by embracing progressivism, but Family Ties turned that trope on its head.
While the packaging was novel, the idea was familiar – children rebel against their parents. And while Family Ties had the unique twist of liberal parents and a conservative kid, the 80s and 90s saw a shift in media where authority figures – and fathers in particular – were depicted as untrustworthy. Think about a show like the Simpsons; Homer Simpson is an idiot and his children mock him constantly. This is not unintentional; the writers of the Simpsons are catechizing us that authority figures are dumb and untrustworthy. While the change in American media happened in the 80s and 90s, the heart of the problem goes back much further than that. That’s why of the Ten Commandments that God gave his people, one of them is Honor your father and your mother.
The 5th Commandment
As we move from the 4th Commandment to the 5th Commandment there is a sense in which we are moving from commandments that emphasize how we are to love God and moving to commandments that emphasize how we are to love our neighbors. At the risk of being overly simplistic, the first four commandments teach us how we are to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and the latter six commandments teach us how to love our neighbors as ourselves. And the 5th Commandment is a bit of a bridge between the two. The 5th Commandment is teaching us how to love people, but they are people who represent God to us. Parents are the first picture of God in a child’s life. The 5th Commandment reveals to us that we can’t honor God if we don’t honor our parents.
And honor is the key word here. The 5th Commandment is not teaching mere obedience but honor. Obedience is implied, especially for children, but the 5th Commandment is teaching more than obedience. The 5th Commandment instructs us that we are to honor our father and mother.
The word honor is the Hebrew word כָּבֵד, which means, “to be heavy, weighted, honored.” It’s the same word used for the glory of YHWH in the Old Testament. There is an inherent weight, inherent glory, in parenthood because, humanly speaking, we come from our parents. No human being has ever been born without the sperm of a father and the egg of a mother. Our culture can lie to themselves all they want but that’s the truth. No one is born without a father and a mother.
And God’s people are called to honor their father and mother. This is not just a command for little kids. Some of you are too comfortable with the 5th Commandment because you think it doesn’t apply to you. Some people treat the 5th Commandment as if it’s kids Sunday school in the middle of the 10 Commandments. Just so we’re all clear – the 5th Commandment is for everyone in the gathering this morning, not just the kids.
There’s no doubt that the obedience of children is part of the 5th Commandment, but it is much more than mere obedience. In fact, the obedience of children would not have been questioned in the ancient Near East. Parents did not view children then how we view children now. Kids run the home too often in our culture.
In our exceptionally therapeutic culture we live individual autonomy to the extreme. Children are encouraged to “live their own truth” to the point now where parents, and our own government, are encouraging children to undergo sex changes; it is madness! This was not the case in the ancient Near East and actually stands in contrast to how people have viewed parenthood for the entire history of the world. For the history of humanity people have understood that children are to obey their parents. Parents are the God-given authority to children and have the responsibility of raising and disciplining their children to be responsible citizens.
So there is no doubt that one element of the 5th Commandment is that children are to obey their parents. But the 5th Commandment is applicable to us for every age. The 5th Commandment instructs adult children to honor their parents. We ought to prize our parents highly. We are to care for them and show them affection. We are to respect them.
God took the 5th Commandment so seriously that it was a capital offense to break the 5th Commandment. I remember being a kid and thinking, “I’m glad I don’t live in Old Testament times because I’d definitely be dead for disobeying my parents;” as if kids disobeyed once and they would be brought outside and stoned. That is not what happened. But children who lived in rebellion, especially older children would be dealt with seriously. Adult children who dishonored their parents and didn’t care for their parents would face the prospect of capital punishment.
We know that God takes the 5th Commandment seriously not only by the punishment but also by the promise given with the 5th Commandment. YHWH commands Israel honor your father and your mother that your days may be long in the land the Lord your God will give you. The other day Andrew and I were talking about how we used to think that our grandpa must’ve been the most obedient child who ever lived because he was in his 70s and 80s when we were little. He actually lived to 102. But that was some bad hermeneutics.
The 5th Commandment does not promise long life to everyone who obeys his or her parents. Remember as you’re reading the Old Testament an important element of interpretation is the covenantal horizon. If you’re reading an Old Testament passage one of the first questions you have to ask yourself is, “what covenant is this text under?” The promise for long days in the land that God gave them was specifically for Israel in the Promised Land. YHWH is saying if you want to stay in the Promised Land, you must be a people who honor your father and mother.
And Israel did not keep the 5th Commandment and that is part of why they experienced the exile. Israel was exiled from the Promised Land, in part, because of their disobedient culture. Their pattern of disobedience led to breach of covenant and yielded YHWH’s discipline. God has ordered the world in such a way that learning honor and obedience to authority, beginning with your own parents, produces human flourishing. Living “the good life” begins with honoring your parents. If you won’t honor your parents, you won’t honor other authorities in your life and that will lead to all sorts of problems.
Jesus Followed & Fulfilled the 5th Commandment
Because that’s what sin does – it leads to death. And that’s why we need Jesus because Jesus is the only person to ever truly follow the 5th Commandment and Jesus is the fulfillment of the 5th Commandment. Jesus always honored his parents. Jesus didn’t always obey his parents but if he disobeyed his parents it’s because his parents were wrong.
Think of when Jesus was twelve and his parents forgot him in Jerusalem. They came back to find Jesus asking questions to teachers in the temple (Luke 2.41-52). Mary and Joseph were like, “what are you doing?” Jesus said, “Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” Jesus understood his Messianic mission better than they did even at twelve. But then in verse 51 it says that Jesus went back to Nazareth with them and he was submissive to them.
Or think about in Mark 3 when Jesus’ family, including Mary is outside trying to stop him from teaching early in his ministry because they’re saying, “he’s out of his mind.” Jesus said, “My mother and my brothers are those who do the will of my Father.” So Jesus disobeyed his parents when they were enticing him to sin, but Jesus always honored his parents. One of the last words that Jesus spoke on the cross was to Mary and John as he told John to take care of Mary as if she was his own mother (John 19.26-27). Even as he’s dying on the cross, Jesus is honoring his father and mother.
Jesus also taught obedience to the 5th Commandment. In Mark 7.8-13 Jesus rebukes the religious leaders for their tradition of Corban. Corban basically meant that people would neglect their elderly parents by insisting that their money had been set-aside for God. Jesus tells them that they are breaking the 5th Commandment.
But Jesus came not only to keep the 5th Commandment and teach the 5th Commandment; Jesus also came to fulfill the 5th Commandment. Jesus fulfills the 5th Commandment by bringing us into God’s family even though we have not honored our heavenly Father. Jesus reveals God as Father to us. That’s why he taught us to pray, “Our Father in heaven hallowed be your name.” That’s why we confess in the Creed, “We believe in God the Father almighty creator of heaven and earth.”
But the problem is there’s not a human being who has ever lived that fully honored their parents. We are all born in sin from Adam’s fall. As a result, no one honors the heavenly Father either. Romans 3.10 says, no one is righteous and no one seeks after God.
But to save us from our sin the Son of God, the eternal 2nd person of the Holy Trinity, became a man in the incarnation when he was conceived by the Holy Spirit and born of the virgin Mary. The Son honored his Father in his obedience to come to save his people. Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant (Phil. 2.5-7). He then lived a truly human life yet without sin (Heb 4.15). Not only did Jesus perfectly keep the 5th Commandment but Jesus kept God’s law in thought, word, and deed.
And then Jesus obeyed his Father when He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross (Phil. 2.8). When Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane before he was arrested he prayed, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done” (Lk. 22.42). Jesus then offered his righteous life to his Father on the cross in exchange for the wrath against the sins of the elect. He paid the penalty of death and he was buried.
But because Jesus was righteous death could not keep him and so three days later he resurrected from the dead. His resurrection vindicated everything Jesus said and did. He truly is the savior. He truly is God. He is the one in whom we find the forgiveness of sins and the hope of eternal life.
And with his resurrection from the dead Jesus creates a new family. His Father adopts all who place their faith in Jesus Christ. For through him we both have access in one Spirit to the Father. So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God (Eph 2.18-19). Jesus said, whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother (Matt 12.50). We are made a part of God’s family because of the obedience of our brother, Jesus.
The 5th Commandment & the Church
So as we consider how we are to keep the 5th Commandment at Christ Community Church in 2023, the first thing we must note is that apart from faith in Jesus it is impossible to keep the 5th Commandment. You must repent and believe in the gospel of Jesus Christ. To repent means to turn from your sin and turn toward Jesus. It means to acknowledge that you are a sinner who needs forgiveness.
You must also have faith in Christ. You must know that God is holy, you are a sinner, and that it is through the person and work of Jesus Christ alone that you can be made right with God. You must assent to the validity of these truth claims. And finally you must transfer your trust to Jesus alone. That means if you were to stand before God today and he were to ask you why he should forgive your sins and grant you eternal life, the only answer you can give is because your trust is in Jesus.
After we believe in Jesus we then must think through how we apply the 5th Commandment as new covenant Christians. For us the old covenant law is Scripture but it is not law; only the moral use of the law still applies to us because the civil and ceremonial uses of the law were fulfilled in Jesus Christ. And so the first application we must make is that the 5th Commandment clearly instructs children to obey their parents. The 5th Commandment is more than a command for children to obey their parents, but it is not less than a command for children to obey their parents.
And so now I’m speaking to everyone in the room who’s under the age of 18. Maybe you feel sometimes like the sermon doesn’t apply to you or that the preacher is not speaking to you, well right now I am speaking directly to you. In the Bible and in the 5th Commandment, God is telling you to obey your parents. The New Testament makes this clear in Ephesians 6.1-3 where Paul quotes the 5th Commandment:
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”
He echoes the same sentiment in Colossians 3.20: Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. The clear revelation of Scripture is that parents are the first picture of God in a child’s life and so children must be obedient to their parents. Kids, when you disobey your parents you are sinning against God. When you honor and obey your parents you are glorifying God.
But as we mentioned before the 5th Commandment requires more than the obedience of children to their parents. The 5th Commandment is applicable for everyone at every point in their lives. Adult children are not required to obey their parents, but we’re all required to honor our parents. For some of us this is very easy because we were raised by faithful, godly parents who loved us and raised us in the fear and admonition of the Lord.
But that’s not true of all of you. Some of you were raised by abusive parents. Some of you were abandoned by your parents. Some of you come from broken homes. Some of you were raised by good, upstanding citizens who reject Jesus or maybe even hate Jesus.
How do you follow the 5th Commandment if that’s your situation? Some of you need to cut off your relationship with one or both of your parents for your own health and safety. Some of you may have a polite but shallow relationship with your parents. Some of you may fight like cats and dogs with your parents but at the end of the day you guys love each other. Others have a great relationship with their parents. Regardless of your situation we should honor our parents in so far as we’re able. From the worst of parents to the best of parents everyone is a sinner so all parents are wrong, to one degree or another, in how they raise their kids. At the same time everyone is created in the image of God so unless they’ve completely seared their conscience and they’re pure evil, every person has qualities they can be honored for.
That leads us to our next application point: parents, we must be parents worthy of honor. We can do so by rightly teaching and disciplining our children. Positively we are called to teach our kids about Jesus. This doesn’t mean that we simply bring them to church and don’t talk about Jesus at all Monday-Saturday. This especially lays at the feet of us dads.
Dad, you are the pastors of your home, whether you want to be or not. Talk to your kids about Jesus. Talk to them about the sermon. Talk to them about what they learned in Sunday school. Read the Bible together. Pray together. Teach your kids about Jesus.
Negatively this happens through discipline. Our culture has outsmarted itself in thinking that we’re too advanced to discipline our children now but the result is that kids run amuck. Scripture commands us to discipline our children and specifically to spank young children. Children must be taught that there is a greater authority than them. There is right and wrong and there are consequences for their sin.
The 5th Commandment begins with parents and their children but it can more broadly be applied to all rightful authorities in our lives. God calls us to submit to those in authority over us. Wives are called to submit to their husbands. Children are called to obey their parents. The church is called to submit to the Elders. If you work you have a boss. We are called to obey the government in so far as the government doesn’t forbid what God commands or command what God forbids. We are to submit to all of the rightful authorities in our lives.
The 5th Commandment also calls us to function as the family of God. The church is called to care for those who don’t have parents – orphans, kids in bad homes, kids with parents who don’t believe. The Bible commands older women to train younger women. Older men are commanded to train younger men.
Likewise we should care for our spiritual parents – older church members who don’t have children or other family to care for them. We should treat them as if they are our own parents. When we say that the church is a family, it is not mere hyperbole. No, we must be brothers and sisters to each other. We are spiritual parents and children to each other.
Finally, the 5th Commandment requires us to remember our spiritual family heritage. We want be the kind of church that honors our parents in the faith. We should appropriately honor Adam, Noah, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, Judah, Moses, Joshua, Ruth, King David, King Solomon, Isaiah, Daniel, Ezra, Nehemiah, Paul, Peter, James, John, Origen, Tertullian, Polycarp, Athanasius, Augustine, Thomas of Aquinas, Martin Luther, John Calvin, John Bunyan, Charles Spurgeon, BB Warfield, Martin Lloyd-Jones. Hebrews 12.1-2 says:
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.
We run our race primarily by looking to Jesus but we are also surrounded by the great cloud of witnesses who have run the race before us. The church triumphant cheers us on as we seek to persevere to the end and for that we should be thankful.
Conclusion
The 5th Commandment requires that we honor our father and mother. We can only do so when we look to Jesus who honored his Father in heaven by his life, death, and resurrection. And it is only when we are in Christ that we can honor our Father in heaven. We are adopted by the Father through the Son and we honor our Father by the power of the Spirit. Look to Jesus because it is only in him that we have family ties to the Father.